3 Months post radiation MRI results in!

Hi everyone -

I FEEL horrible that I haven't blogged in awhile. I actually got my MRI results about a week ago but have been so busy with trying to pursue Sharp and getting this covered for others AND I didn't know what to think after my appointment with my oncologist.

I met w/Dr. Smith (my oncology/radiologist doc) last week and he told me that the tumor is still the same size as it was prior to treatment. They were actually expecting to see it a 'little bigger' because radiation will initially cause the tumor to swell and then necrosis (tissue death) will take place and the tumor will begin to shrink. This happens over a period of 6-9 months so my NEXT MRI (in 6 months) will then confirm if the radiation worked and we killed the tumor.

He said all looked as it should. I know this is TOTALLY dumb but all I could think was, 'Why isn't it bigger? Did they not 'zap' the right area?' I kept anticipating it being a little bigger but it wasn't - AND now I know that THAT's OK! (smile). The Cyberknife office I went to has so many quality assurance measures in place it's ridiculous. So, I KNOW they did the right spot/area but I guess I won't really feel like things are 'o.k.' until I get that confirmation that the darn thing is dead.

So, I went into a little hole of self-doubt for just a short time and then got out! (sound like me from past posts??!!) :) All is well in my world today - really.........!!

Now come all the follow-up appointments. I see my ENT (Ear/Nose/Throat) doctor today. Going to see what is up with the darn ringing in my ear. My oncology doc said it's probably 'increased blood flow' to the area - post treatment. I am hoping that's it. But, if ringing is what I have for the rest of my life then I'll deal w/it! He did tell me that 6-12 months post radiation starts a 'whole new set of symptoms'..............egads. So, just good thoughts and praying that everything stays as is. I actually could still get a palsey episode (facial paralysis) and my face does do some weird, funky twitching at times but now it's just entertainment for me (smile).

God is good, life is good, hug those closest to you because you never know what tomorrow brings and smile more often - it's contagious!!! :)

Today's Daily Affirmation:

"We all possess the thunder of pure fury and the calm breeze of tranquility. If it wasn't for tomorrow, how much would we get done today? Whatever your purpose... embrace it completely. Get lost in the clouds every now and then so you never lose sight of God's wonder." ~Paul Vitale

Mother's Day was this past weekend and I couldn't be more grateful to my little babies who helped me get through last year. One day when you read this babies, I hope you know that I will forever be indebted to you for your unconditional love, smiles, hugs and kisses!!! It made everything difficult much easier to endure.

Have a great week everyone and I'll update a little more the next few weeks post appointments! :)

Rachelle