Stanford visit

The Stanford trip was a huge success (at least Kim and I thought so)! :)

First off - on my way to the airport, two songs came on that reminded me of my babies and Chris. The weird part is that they came on back to back and it just made me feel like they were going to be there with me the whole trip (in spirit of course).

Got to the airport and had a quick, uneventful flight to San Jose. When I arrived, I was off like a mad-woman on the hunt for my rental car. Kim was flying in a half hour after me so the plan was to get the car and then be ready to pick her up and then head up to Stanford to make my first appointment.

Kim got in on time and all was going good (except for the fact that my 'lovely' rental was not cleaned from the 'previous' users and smelled like an ashtray...ugh). Note to self: DO NOT use Fox Car Rentals... :)

We headed up to Stanford, got to my first appointment and Doctor #1. He had a lot of information for me and recommended the Cyberknife treatment (3 sessions vs. the 6 week session the San Diego doctor recommended). He said Cyberknife is better because the fractionated radiation (6 week session) in addition to treating the tumore also treats the cells 'around' the tumor. The problem with this is that it can cause cancer in the future! :( Any radiation treatment has the potential but the Cyberknife is very accurate to only treating and killing the dreaded thing.

He was very nice, took a lot of time with us and I felt it was very helpful.

Doctor #2 was very nice man too and took almost 2 hrs with our visit. One thing he saw that no other doctor has seen or noticed was the tumor. Yes, he put this camera thing in my ear and showed me the tumor on this TV that was up on the wall. Once I got past the grossness and embarrassment of seeing several hairs and wax build up in my ear (as my best friend Kim was saying, "that's fascinating!") I too thought that it was pretty fascinating. (OK - didn't mean to disgust you all but the doctor put me at ease by saying - most ears are like that! :) Funny too - I made SURE I cleaned my ears out good that morning because I KNEW they would be looking in them. I just never thought about what my little QTip would be up against!! :) Doctor #2 was VERY informative since he has treated with radiation AND has done several surgeries. So I have decided - he is my man! I want Doctor #2 to treat me.

So, this is easy right? I finally got answers, found a physician I like but 'oh wait' - I have an HMO................................

So now comes a LOT of homework. We shall see how that goes but both doctors recommended that I come up for treatment as soon as I can (like in the next few weeks).

Doctor #2 did say he has a 'red flag' about the 'amount it grew in such a short time.' If the MRI (prior to radiation) shows another substantial increase in growth, we might have to look into surgery (for biopsy reasons). Long story short, there can be damage to the hearing/facial nerve from radiation....so, if surgery has to be done after that (for some reason), then the chances of hearing loss are pretty good and facial nerve being regenerated, not very good either.

I did learn that my tumor is very rare. I guess that answers why I couldn't get so many of my questions answered in the beginning.

I see my Primary Doctor tomorrow to update her and then we will go from there.

Pray that my insurance doesn't make me appeal over and over and over for treatment and that I am able to get this done soon.

Today's daily affirmation:

I ANSWER TO MYSELF AND NO ONE ELSE. The person looking back at you in the mirror is the one you have to answer to every day.

Thanks for all your prayers and good thoughts! I feel them and they keep me strong!!

Love,

Rachelle